Chronicles of a HeadCase

I’ve been thinking of coming through one of these day and  I hope to understand where you’re coming from real soon. Sleeping all day and always up all night, I find that its always too soon to be getting this high, not that it stops me… but it took a long time to get me so wrong for so many of you, and its gonna take a longer time to make me right for somebody. lol, coz everything that should hurt me doesn’t seem to… so here I am dangling constantly from a perpetual sunshine, I wonder when will a wavering moon appear before me and drown me in reflections and not in vain. I wonder how far I will fall before I can start making my way up again, it feels alright to be in the silver lining, but sometimes I do miss the clouds. Drifting darkness seems to always come along to cover up every sparkle in our eyes, and its not that we’re too blind to see the angels and all their demons, its just that our goggles are fogged up by all the neon lights and shimmering sights… she is just out of focus and out of context right now. So she doesn’t happen to be in my mental playground now, so why am I waiting for the fallen to come crashing thru my sand castles and distill my thoughts? Perhaps even plant a heart in this faultless paradise…

Had a blast at the Ritz again this year, can’t believe I was up till 6 am! hehe. Bar-tending poisons in the form of shots to everyone, all were ushering in the new year, and puking out the old… lol. After more than twenty bottles of liquors and whiskey, and who knows how many beers and stout, I think its safe to assume everyone had a blast. I bet they are all cursing the bartender (me) today haha…

Amidst the chaos and craziness of our drunken stupor last night, somehow I did find time to reflect on the year, how much I’ve gained, how much I’ve lost… seems to even out for me, and I get to start at scratch again every time. Although, it never really is a clean slate…there will always be the memories of those who had made impacts on my life and made me who I am today. I hope in this new year, starting today (maybe tomorrow), I will find time to reconnect with friends and loved ones I still hold dear, disconnect with the stagnant, regretful and purposeless parts of my life and hopefully find success in my new endeavours. No matter how big or small, I hope I get to make something out of nothing and spin a story out of it for the next new year, and I will continually be the binding in the book adding pages containing stories of the lives of all those that have touched mine. May it be a never ending story, and may happiness find us all this annum. With that said, happy new year to all, lets make 2010 count for something worthwhile. Cheers and down it!!! =)  

Click Here to see pictures from our NYE 2010 party at the Ritz. More will be added soon, was busy bar-tending most of the night, didn’t get to take many pics.

In all this time, some of us fade into the cruel world and rarely is it our choice in who is taken and who isn’t. The weak is never forgiven but the terrified are the ones that make the weak weaker. We have so much to prove and so much to wait for in this only lonely life. Yet, we believe we know ourselves all so well, but very few people ever do know who we are nor who we were. Friends and families are the strangers that make knowing us feel more like who we are supposed to be… I have to let my chances go by, I have to give my hand to fate and take pause in the fluttering wings of life that make us feel like captured frames in these fleeting moments. We won’t go through this again, but will live it forever playing in our memories, again and again… and when the clouds start to close in, I will not feel what may be and understand that the wheel will spin so I will always be the stranger in this strange world. May the stage always be decorated in crimson and velvet so that our audience will always know to take those chances and keep that wheel spinning for that never ending last dance.