To Be Truly Selfish Is To Be Selfless
by HeadCase on Jul.12, 2008, under Philosophical
From the day we are born we view this world from our perspective, a perspective where we seem to be the center of this reality. All that appears real to us is what we want, what we feel and what we think. Selfish nature seems to be innate within our brains and yet as we age, some of us develop a selfless nature for we learn to see from the perspective of the others around us. Those who suffer more understand the sufferings of others, those who experience hunger know what it is for others to go hungry and etc. Yet, with all the information around us to adequately equip us with the wisdom of the suffering and pain of all those around us, our selfish nature seems to prevail most of the time.
I used to be a bad tempered selfish brat that only cared about what I wanted, this eventually developed into how I wanted people to feel because obviously most of the time, I couldn’t get what I want and somewhere along the way, I realized that it was a downward spiral of negative emotion and desire which is selfish above all else. Eventually, I also realized that getting what I wanted out of the spite of getting what I wanted, never really filled that gap of want in me. That was where I started to learn to start the chain reaction of goodwill which would only come back to me and others I cared for… that was my first frail understanding of karma. What I want can pass as easily as a thought in my mind but the karmic ripples of thought and action could eventually rupture into a tsunami of destructive thought waves.
I’m 30 this year, I have met almost every kind of person there is to meet… by learning not to judge at an early age, I was able to befriend everyone from a junkie to a religious fanatic… by understanding the state they were in and why they are the way they are, forces you to accept why they need to be, who they are and what makes them tick. That in turn forced me to dig deeper in myself to see why I am the way I am. This cyclical inner self diagnosis can be overwhelming and tiresome at times; but it made me look at myself in the 3rd person for the last 10-15 years. That is why sometimes I am not even sure who I am, let alone the purpose of my existence.
With meditation and thought, I begun to see that what is, is, and why I exist? Is to simply exist. And to exist as me is simply not enough as we all exist as one and as many. Under a microscope we are an individual, but as a whole, we are one enormous conscious and sentient being, every single matter in the universe is a part of us. So to be selfish on a full scale, we would have to fill every want from everyone, which is impossible, so the next logical thought process would be to eliminate that pointless want. And that is why Wisdom and Compassion goes hand in hand. If you understand selfishness in love and in hate, then it would make sense to you to love all of ourselves (everyone around us) and hate all that would make any of us feel pain and suffering. And to achieve that, each of us would need to attain enlightenment, god’s grace and/or Allah’s love, for IF it can be possibly deduced that the billions of us are as one, why can’t the beliefs we have be similar, but merely tainted by interpretation and translation. For, it takes courage to love someone, but great courage to love everyone. So if you are innately selfish, like 99% of the world, you need to rethink the scale of the self that you comprehend.
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October 17th, 2008 on 7:47 am
hai there !
i like ur realizaton ..
but as young as i am ..
i wanna tell u that ..
it is so much better if we will
be good and in loving the people because God so love us ! =)
tnk u !
may u find meaning in Christ =)
October 17th, 2008 on 6:27 pm
haiii
October 17th, 2008 on 8:49 pm
nice realization..gud to know u realized it.keep trusting god. i never cared how strong my faith is, all that matters to me is doing the right thing. but then, i realized too that having a strong faith in god is a part, no, a very big part of deep realization of things..
October 18th, 2008 on 10:24 am
your totally right! tnx 4 sharing.. i’ve also come to that realization..
October 18th, 2008 on 5:46 pm
Well it seems like every one has shared the P.O.V. and i cant help but wonder why some aspects of the post thier are thouse that point out thier thought of life and as if putting it on some one else’s face to see the truth ?
I dont want to ruin the beutify comment of people on this account but what struck me is the “exsist to exsist” part of your note… self realization is give to us we dont need to be religously point at
Thats why we have a seed of that knowledge embeded in us ..
bottom line : ” When we acknowledge and see our selves for the true nature we are, Lets thank God ,he allowed us to see our selves”
hey very eye opening topic
hope i didnt sound a know it all
hahaha
October 18th, 2008 on 8:05 pm
hi.! i like yUr bLog.! its so inspiring.! take care always.! ^^
October 19th, 2008 on 5:12 am
Nice post!
It seems easy to say that when we love we should love and give unselfish love but, to think deeper, it is really hard. There is that point in loving people that we really expect something in return. It is a good thing that you realize the “unselfish love”.
I hope people you meet will see you as what you wanted them to see you. By the way, this is the second time I read a post on your blog and I think I will wait for some writings to be featured again.
Good luck and may you be blessed.
October 20th, 2008 on 1:46 am
wow! it’s really impressive to write something like that.. keep it up! love to read ur blogs, so post more!
October 20th, 2008 on 6:55 pm
hi casey,your such a good writer,Your article is so impressive…just keep it up .i hope u inspire everybody who read it. God BLESs YOu anD gudlucK
October 20th, 2008 on 8:39 pm
hallo…..
pa kbar…..
October 21st, 2008 on 2:04 am
GOOD JOB!!!!
VERY interesting!!
October 21st, 2008 on 10:46 am
I’m a fan now!!! How inspiring… ^___________^
October 22nd, 2008 on 4:51 am
uhmmm…
October 22nd, 2008 on 6:44 am
interesting thoughts.
well here is one thing i wanna share to you that i learned over the past few days.
one morning while i was having my quiet time before i went out for a jog. i was reading the Book of John when a verse struck me most. “He must become greater, I must become less.” John 3:30. I have been going through tough times lately, paying for yesterdays mischiefs. I asked myself more than a couple of times where i went wrong. did i miss the part where i was suppose to turn right but instead i turned left because it was an easier way. but there is no such thing as an easier way really. the easier way is normally the harder way. even harder than harder.
i realized how selfish i was. even though i thought about others more than i did to myself. how i would be more troubled when a good friend of mine is in trouble and all that stuff. i pride myself for doing anything just to make someone feel better. that was me. i liked being that way. i wasn’t selfish. or so i thought.
but things changed. i didn’t miss turning right at the next crossroad. i started going to Bible studies. i started going back to church. i started reading the Bible more than i used to. and i’ve realized, how selfish i was back then. not because i was unfair to my friends or to my family but to Him. the One who died on the cross to save you and me. i thought i was doing a good job of making Him happy because i was helping others. but then i realized how much He hurts because i forgot about Him. He never stopped drawing me closer though but everytime He dis, i pushed Him further away. but He never gave up. and now i am born in Him again. i could never be better. all this time i’ve been helping others, it was me who needed all the help i could get all along. and now that i am back with Him, i never forget to remember one thing. to have more of Him, and have less of me. if to be selfless would mean my nothingness in this world, i’d be more than willing to be it. for i know in my Fathers Kingdom, i am a VIP.
October 22nd, 2008 on 9:43 pm
cool! ;]
October 23rd, 2008 on 1:12 am
sorry guys… casey is like extremely busy these days. His mom got admitted and he had to take care of the family. So i think he will come out with something really great soon. be supportive guys.. ciao..
October 24th, 2008 on 9:07 am
hai friend nice to meet all of you
October 24th, 2008 on 9:11 am
eh aq lg binung nich aq pnya oranisasi namanya forum anak tapi banyak anak yang tidak berangkat saat kumpul. tolong dong kasih aq saran even yang menarik tuk bikin pada betah makasih banget lho, bye
October 26th, 2008 on 5:10 am
♥♥♥…you can view my blog if you want!…you have a wide points of view!
i think your nice…♥♥♥..
October 27th, 2008 on 9:02 am
okay someone here add me pls.
October 27th, 2008 on 10:33 pm
finally! a pretty readable blog on friendster!
October 28th, 2008 on 1:11 am
“I used to be a bad tempered selfish brat that only cared about what I wanted…” – so am i. it is so hard to be like this, but somehow i still manage to deal with it.
October 28th, 2008 on 9:26 pm
woah
great writings
i just found it on FEATURED blog so i take a look at it
and my time doesnt goes through waste
thanks fr posting this thingy
bravo
October 29th, 2008 on 12:02 pm
Thanks for the blog, it’s great! I am a Christian and your article proves that all of us is searching for the same undefined as interconnected to each other religion doesn’t matter I just get a glimpse, We have to be selfless to emit the divine love that we have to show and share to the world. Hope to read more from you….
October 31st, 2008 on 11:02 pm
Great Article! Some zen thought here, but I agree fully with you. To give unconditionally, that’s the way to go. That’s the best reward coz the exultation garnered surmounts everything else. Even better than striking lottery perhaps…
November 1st, 2008 on 8:56 am
my god so many replies
November 2nd, 2008 on 12:35 am
Wow…sometimes I feel the same way too… I’m always finding the true me…. And because we’re not perfect we became selfish sometimes but sometimes it’s because we love truly that we hate the thought of loosing that someone and know that God knows what to teach us to open our minds…. He has a way to teach ryt fRom wrOng… God is the answer
November 3rd, 2008 on 2:17 am
i enjoy reading your blogs and i had learned a lot of stuff…i had seen myself in that,it’s very inspiring…
November 5th, 2008 on 11:15 am
i have is my blog
November 5th, 2008 on 11:15 am
is my lieve
November 5th, 2008 on 6:10 pm
hai???
November 5th, 2008 on 6:15 pm
hi….friend Capa yg mau knL aq add aja di velove_ananda@yahoo.com
November 6th, 2008 on 6:27 pm
very nice!! are u an author of a book or something?
November 12th, 2008 on 8:11 pm
Nice one dude. Are u an author of a book? Ur post is full of meanings. I Love it. ^^
November 13th, 2008 on 1:02 pm
THE TRUTH ABOUT LIFE IS IN GOD-HIS WORDS-, NO ONE ELSE, IF U LOOKED THE OTHER WAY AROUND UR MESSING UP WITH YOUR LIFE ITS A DEAD END. NO OTHER WAY BUT GOD, CHRIST JESUS. SHALOM!PEACE!
LIVE A LIFE WITH HIM, LIFE IS SHORT,., BY THE WAY NICE TOPIC U HAVE A APPRECIATED IT MUCH.
November 21st, 2008 on 12:33 pm
you leave me in a very deep thought after reading this
November 24th, 2008 on 2:09 pm
wow, so many comments. Wondering you will notice my comment or not? Yes, I have been learning to the ‘unconditional love’ 4 yrs ago. Recently, i am reading a book ‘The art of remaking men -Paul Campbell’. Selfish can be origin from the lust for sex/security/success. Based on my own experience, all the lust will only be eliminated when i have found something within myself instead of keep asking/requesting from outside/others. The emptiness in my heart will never be filled up by asking from outside.
I’ve used to write my thoughts in my blog also (http://xycherry.blogspot.com) but most of the time in mandarin. I have learnt to keep myself silent,close eyes, silent time in the morning. Most of the time,i will look into myself instead of pointing others short coming. Bec it doesn’t help me to keep pointing others, by the end of the day the most problems came from me! Let’s look at our hand when pointing people, there are 3 fingers pointing ourselves.(sometime others might be the mirror of me,depends whether we can see it from outside or not?)
No matter how, i am appreciate your sharing really great. Thank you.~~~
Quote”You borrow the money you don’t have,
You buy the things you don’t need,
You impress the people you don’t like!”
November 27th, 2008 on 7:18 pm
That was deep but it made me think…
November 27th, 2008 on 7:36 pm
it seems that you’re a very deep person……..your essay is very sensible………….
December 4th, 2008 on 6:04 pm
hey u have a lot of comments from this post. All i can say is loving oneself first before you can rally say you love others. Its hard to love others especially those people we see everyday who knows nothing but to block our way. These people are indeed unlovable.. but with the miracle of prayer, it cleanses ones heart.
December 14th, 2008 on 10:34 pm
nice.
but one thing i have found, beneath all these words. speaks one truth. your getting OLD.
yeah, we are all going in that direction, a road seldom cross not until you’ve become exhausted, weary, melancholic, and with age.
but i can say, you’ve never meet the person, who taught me deeper meaning and understanding life and God.
There is no such thing as INNATE SELFISHNESS. Its the environment around you, you learn to be SELFISH. from what u may have seen, percieve or understand. We humans have an INNATE GOODNESS, our body design not to kill, we dont have fangs or claws to rip people, far above we have understanding, to UNDERSTAND anybody that may came across everyday. One thing is clear, you have within you is INCONTENTMENT. being content in whatever [circumstance] leads no room to a person to be selfish.
jaa nee.
December 17th, 2008 on 5:05 am
hello .
nice thought…but too selfish!!!
December 18th, 2008 on 11:29 am
Third(3rd) paragraph, last sentence, you said “That is why sometimes I am not even sure who I am, let alone the purpose of my existence”. By this statement it is clear that you are confused. A thought from a confused person will sow confusion among its readers.
Even Jesus said “Love others like you love Yourself”. I am sure of this quote I just don’t know what part in the Bible or what verse. This qoute is clearly in contradiction with what you are preaching in your blog.
So if you understand what Jesus has taught, you will understand that Jesus wants us to be somewhere in between selfishness and selflessness. In that way there’s balance in our lives.
December 18th, 2008 on 9:18 pm
whew..that was a blasT! ^^
January 8th, 2009 on 11:53 pm
inspiring entry.. God Bless You and everyone reading your blog.. have a nice day! (*^__^*).v..
January 9th, 2009 on 1:57 pm
Wow, that was deep..
(claps for u, casey)
but i know to myself
I’m not selfish so i
think there’s nothing
I should say about this.
All i know is that I do have
a symbiotic relationship with my
friends, and family.. a thing we call give and take (^.^)
January 16th, 2009 on 8:34 pm
good one.
cheers!
pls view my blog. thnx guys!
February 1st, 2009 on 7:41 pm
it’s to deep ..
but i can relate into it ..
and it made me think .. =)
nice entry ..
Godbless!
February 6th, 2009 on 1:26 pm
Casey, just droppin by n get amaze with your point of view. well said, luv it.
hope to read more of your writing.
have a good weekend
February 12th, 2009 on 10:48 pm
I love this post….It makes a lot of sense and i can actually relate to it.